All of us have unchangeable features that make us unique individuals. When these differences are pointed out, especially in insensitive or even malicious ways, the resulting concerns may cause varying degrees of self-rejection. Individuals who demonstrate the following traits may struggle with the issue of self-rejection.

• Inability to Trust God
  

  If a person rejects God’s design for his physical appearance, he probably will have difficulty putting confidence in the Designer’s plan for other areas of his life.

• Excessive Shyness
  

  Fear of rejection by others motivates us to avoid the risk of interaction with others.

• Difficulty in Loving Others
  

  “Thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself” (Matthew 19:19). If we cannot accept our design and love ourselves in the right way, we will have difficulty loving others.

• Self-Criticism
  

  Complaints about unchangeable physical features, abilities, parentage, and social heritage are indications of self-rejection.

• Wishful Comparison With Others
  

  Desiring to be different in areas that cannot be changed is a clear evidence of self-rejection. “ … Shall the thing formed say to him that formed it, Why hast thou made me thus?” (Romans 9:20).

• Over-Attention on Clothes
  

  Undue concern for clothes may be an attempt to cover up or compensate for physical features that are perceived as “bad.”

• Floating Bitterness
  

  Many people have said, “I hate myself!” They may be referring to their words or actions in the past, or they may be referring to their whole being. In the latter case, their final hatred will be directed toward the One Who made them.

• Perfectionism
  

  It is healthy to want to do our best, but when the time expended outweighs the value of the accomplishment, it is an indication of self-rejection—condemning your best as “never good enough.”

• Attitudes of Superiority
  

  A person with an attitude of superiority actually feels inferior but is trying to narrow his field of comparison.

• Awkward Attempts to Hide Unchangeable Defects
  

  Actions and statements that reveal an attitude of self-consciousness may indicate self-rejection. However, we can trust God to transform our weaknesses: “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (II Corinthians 12:9).

• Extravagance
  

  Lavish spending on expensive items may be an attempt to gain admiration and acceptance from others.

• Wrong Priorities
  

  Self-rejection may be reflected in a neglect of God-given responsibilities in order to spend much time in pursuit of that which could bring acclaim from others.

Dealing with self-rejection requires turning to God, thanking Him for how He made you, and understanding the reality of who you are in Christ. To conquer self-rejection, begin by meditating on the truth of Scripture and what God says about you. Personalize verses such as I Peter 1:23, Ephesians 1:6, Philippians 1:6, and Romans 8:1. As a result of accepting and believing Satan's lies, you may have yielded areas of your soul to his dominating influence; these areas need to be reclaimed. When old thoughts of rejection come back, they need to be taken captive to the obedience of Christ (see II Corinthians 10:5).